About Town

Weave these words into your dialogue:

Insatiable – constantly wanting more.

Insipid – without flavor, tasteless.

Laity – all the people not among the clergy.

Lascivious – characterized by lust or lewdness.

Man of letters – writer, scholar, editor.

Megalomania – delusions of grandeur, power.

Puissant – powerful, strong, mighty.

Sagacity – sound judgment, intelligence.

It was a cold Saturday morning. Even so, golf was on my mind. So unable to resist, I grabbed my driver and 3 metal, plunked down $15, and spent an hour or so hitting golf balls at the newly opened Papi J’s Fairway Grille and Indoor Golf in the Shop’n Save Plaza on Pennsylvania Avenue in Weirton.

The manager and chief executive officer, Jason Cupps, 39, patiently described the full-swing, simulated golf practice range. I had a good workout.

Jason said there were 92 golf courses to play on the simulated setup, one of them being Oakmont. The full complex – Papi J’s Fairway Grille and Indoor Golf – will have hours from 6 a.m. to 9 p.m.

Best wishes to the new business!

The 78th annual membership meeting and banquet of the Weirton Area Chamber of Commerce drew a large crowd at the Serbian-American Cultural Center. The food was excellent and Chamber President Brenda Mull kept the program moving as she reviewed the chamber’s many accomplishments.

First Choice America Credit Union was recognized for its 75th anniversary year and the entire Board of Directors was on hand, plus the marketing team.

My good neighbor, retiring bank executive Bill D’Alesio, was honored as a past chamber board member, as were printer Joe Stankiewicz and funeral home owner Doug Finton.

It was good to see Arden O. Ford, vice president of operations at Hancock County Savings Bank, who said he reads our column. Thank you, Arden.

Overheard: “It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.”

I have this good friend who has great respect for old age – especially if it is bottled!

Last week I went to a psychiatrist and told him I am always forgetting things.

I asked him what I should do. He suggested I pay him in advance!

It was nice to receive a phone call from Jim Longacre, resident of The Villages, Fla. Jim worked for Weirton Steel for many years and later was executive director of Weirton United Way.

A co-worker asked, “Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?”

Overheard: “I might resume exercising so I can hear heavy breathing again.”

Old age is all in your head: hair loss, glaucoma, hearing aids, cataracts and Alzheimer’s. To old timers, Happy Hour is a nap! Count me in.

I got a chuckle upon reading this: “A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.”

Thank a veteran today!

About Town

Weave these words into your vocabulary:

Fealty – loyalty, faithfulness.

Capricious – erratic, flighty.

Detritus – pile of material or debris.

Ergonomics – adapting work to suit the worker.

Ophthalmologist – he or she deals with the eye.

Shillelagh – Irish walking stick.

Oscillate – swinging back and forth.

Portmanteau – a traveling case or bag.

Platitude – commonplace, trite speech.

Egregious – flagrant, conspicuously bad.

Sacrosanct – very sacred, holy.

Hats off to the staff and all committee members and supporters who contributed to the 2013 Weirton United Way campaign. Together, you enabled the charity to meet its goal: that of feeding and caring for the hungry, the poor, the elderly, the sick and those who suffer in disasters. Good work!

The St. Patrick’s Day party of C.H.A.N.G.E. Inc. at Mountaineer had all of the ingredients of a well-planned party, including good food, hot music and lots of people in Irish dress. Among them was Tom McDonald, in full regalia. As fund-raising events go, this one was a winner. As always, It was fun to sit with Jack Thayer and his lovely escort, Janet Stagani, among others at our table.

A shout-out to Don Hickey of Marland Heights, whom I met at the C.H.A.N.G.E. Inc. party. Don is a letter carrier with 27 years of service and my house is on his route. Thank you for the first class service, Mr. Hickey!

“Woman is that peculiar class

Which stops before a looking glass

And in herself sees every flaw

Would man his faults as clearly saw!”

(A couplet by Edgar A. Guest)

So this housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweat shirt.

Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to ask, “What setting do I use on the washing machine?”

“It depends,” the wife replied. “What does it say on your shirt?”

The guy yelled back, “Pitt Panthers.”

Somebody somewhere whispered to me: “First-time romance; second-time finance.”

“Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.”

–Mark Twain.

Somewhere I saw this sign: “Middle age is when your old classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they don’t recognize you.”

The lady down the street was describing her ideal vacation: nice room with a view of the ocean, big screen television and a short walk to a casino!

Overheard: “I gave up drinking, smoking and golf last week. It was the worst 15 minutes of my life.”

These words describe me pretty well: “I love everything that’s old: old friends, old times, old manners, old books, old wine.”

– “She Stoops to Conquer,” Act 1, Scene 2.

Overheard: “I’ve been calculating my net worth. In a decade or so, I should have one.”

I picked the Florida Gators to take it all in college basketball this year.

About Town

Employ any of these words in your next letter:

Lexophile – lover of words.

In vino veritas – in wine there is truth.

Magnus Opus – a great work of art or music.

Intrepid – bold, fearless, brave.

Inveigh – to make a violent verbal attack.

Non sequitur – conclusion that does not follow.

Paragon – a model of excellence.

Pernicious – causing great injury.

Renege – to deny, renounce.

Timorous – full of or subject to fear.

I have yet to see the Oscar winning movie, “All Quiet On the Western Front,” named best picture in 1930. I am told it is an excellent film. Wonder if it rivals our choice for best movie ever, “Saving Private Ryan.”

After reading the fascinating Boscov’s Department Store ad in the Wheeling newspaper, I intend to make my first visit to their local store. Boscov’s is celebrating 100 years of success.

Overheard: “Every time my husband manages to get his temper under control, he plays another round of golf.”

Is it true that the San Francisco cable cars are the only mobile national monuments? Perhaps so.

In a cruel winter like we’re having, to combat the tenacious cold, snow and ice, a bachelor friend of mine acquired one of those soothing, comforting portable heaters. Yep. Her name is Amber!

A great line attributed to a legend among college football coaches, Bear Bryant: “A team has one heartbeat together.”

Here are some lines for golfers from Edgar A. Guest, who at one time was America’s greatest poet:

“You may brag of your scores and may boast of your skill

You may think as a golfer you’re good.

But if footprints you make in the traps you don’t fill

You don’t love the game as you should;

For your attitude unto the spot you enjoy

Isn’t proven by brilliance or force;

The proof of a golfer – now get this, my boy!

Is the care which he takes of the course.”

I thought this was clever: “I have been in many places, but I’ve never been in Cahoots. Apparently you can’t go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone. I’ve also never been in Cognito. I have, however, been in Sane. I have also been in Doubt. Sometimes I’m in Capable, and I go there more often as I’m getting older.

My choice for taking it all in the upcoming NCAA basketball tournament: the Florida Gators.

Picks by others:

Rick Smith – Kansas;

Phil Rujak – Wichita State;

David Ralston – Duke;

Dan Greathouse – Florida;

Dean Berardino -Michigan State;

Don Gianni Jr. – Kansas;

Tom McDonald -Syracuse; and

Jim Friebe – Syracuse.