×

The struggle of the first day photo

The first day of school snuck up on me this year. We didn’t even go shopping for clothes until two day before we started, but we spent six weeks this summer either on vacation or at camp, so we didn’t have a lot of free time.

Also, I’m not good at time management.

I didn’t even buy their school supplies until after they started school, but every year I buy anything before school, it always ends up being the wrong things and I’ve got to go back to the store anyway. Might as well save myself a trip.

At least Sassy and I didn’t argue too much over her school clothes this year. I’ve finally reached the acceptance stage. She will forever dress like your favorite, hip, young college professor. My expectations were so low that when she picked out a pink sweater, I was excited. The Professor only wanted plain T-shirts with no graphics on them and jeans. All he needs is pomade and a pack of cigarettes rolled into a sleeve and he could travel back to 1950, no problem.

I thought I would do something nice for them, get up early and make fresh muffins for their first day of school breakfast. I would get up at 5:30 a.m. … or maybe 5:45 a.m. … OK, 6 a.m.

I did crawl out of bed at what I would not politely call a reasonable hour to make muffins. I had them pick out their first-day outfits and pack their bags the night before. By the time they go to college, I will finally have this thing down.

I made sure they were neat, well-groomed, supplied with the basics and had their instruments. I even made muffins for them to put in their face holes.

But when I asked them to pose for the obligatory first day picture, you would have thought that I’d asked for a pint of blood and pound of flesh. They scowled.

My social media feed over the past week has been an unending flood of happy children on their first day of school, beaming into the camera and posing. My children have a hate-tolerate relationship with the camera, and most photos have them regarding the lens with a look of suspicious disdain or annoyed ennui.

“It’s the first day of school,” I said. “Go stand over there so I can take your photo.”

They shuffled over to the indicated spot and slouched, staring apathetically at me. They might as well be getting their mug shot taken. The Professor might have been sleeping with his eyes open. It was still early. I thought about asking them to smile, but we were already 10 minutes behind where I wanted to be, so I just took the photo and stuffed them in the car.

When I finally got a chance to look at the photo, I saw that it was out of focus. Somehow, it seems both apt and allegorical.

I put it up on my social media anyway.

(Wallace-Minger, The Weirton Daily Times community editor, is a Weirton resident and can be contacted at swallace@pafocus.com)

NEWSLETTER

Today's breaking news and more in your inbox

I'm interested in (please check all that apply)
Are you a paying subscriber to the newspaper? *

COMMENTS

Starting at $4.73/week.

Subscribe Today